Since the 2 people that read my blog were horrified at my "elitist" attitude concerning LCD, I feel that I owe a part 2. Although sequels are almost never as popular as the original.
I've never been good at writing stuff down. When I write about something controversial, I'm always surprised at how offended people are. It's because I don't express myself well. I think one thing and when I write it or say it, it comes out all wrong.
All my life I thought people were mean to me because I was smart (a nerd). I was small and skinny in school and always made straight A's. I didn't fit in.
But, in hindsight and after yesterday's debacle, I realize that maybe it was 90% to do with my attitude. I was shy. Perhaps my shyness and my failure to clearly communicate made me come off as an elitist and no one likes an elitist. I know I can't stand them.
Having said all of that, if I were forced to go back to Junior High/High School today, I wouldn't want to be in classes with kids who don't want to learn. The kids that don't want to learn and go out of their way to disrupt the learning process are the least common denominators. They should be removed until they can fix their attitude. I'm afraid the "no child left behind" policy doesn't account for the ones that are purposefully dragging their feet.
I had a real good friend in school who was disabled. I wouldn't want to go to a different school than him. He made me smile. He didn't fit in any better than I did, but he didn't care. He also didn't make fun of me or try to intimidate me for making A's in algebra.
Gar---
ReplyDeleteThe kids who want to learn, learn that the proper grammar is "kids who don't want to learn" not "kids that don't want to learn."
During my school experience I do not recollect any dummies being able to disrupt the learning process. In my experience those types were quickly marginalized.
I think, maybe, your troubles came from being the smart kid in a very small school. I think your experience would have been totally different if you'd been in a large school with a lot of smart kids. I'm fairly certain of that.
And if that had been your reality you would not have developed the, well, elitist attitude you have developed. Which you should just drop. Because it just is not grounded in reality. In my humble opinion.
I agree that I would have been much better off at a larger school.
ReplyDeleteI don't have an elitist attitude.
I'm trying to drop whatever it is I do or say that causes people to believe this.
It would help if I knew exactly what it was.
And don't give me examples from the last few days. Those are symptoms.
Durango, you're asking Gar to change behaviors that have been imprinted over the past 40 years, that's a very challenging proposition and one that's gonna require a bit more than you just pointing out what he needs to repair.
ReplyDeleteI graduated 2nd in that same small school that Gar attended. I felt somewhat left out not so much picked on...not like Lester Kemp. Remember Lester, Gar? He was RELENTLESSLY picked on because he was slow and not handsome like some of the other boys. I wonder if he uses this treatment in high school as an excuse for his behavior today?
We can look to our past to help determine why we react to situations in the present. But once you realize that, then you can say, "I'm reacting this way because I was picked on and now it's caused me to develop a defense mechanism that prevents me from trusting anyone openly. Without trust I can't fully connect with people." That's just an example...once you identify it, then change how you react, quit using it as the basis for your reactions.
From your description to Durango, I'm getting the feeling that you still hold a bit of animosity towards those that picked on you...I also think that you've made this group into a larger group than what it was. We'll tend to exaggerate in order to justify our feelings.
Hey, but what do I know...I'm just a dumb blonde. ;)
CT2----
ReplyDeleteYou are better than I at getting under the surface and closer to the core issue, in trying to crack a tough nut like Gar.
Did I just mix in one too many metaphors?
Gar----
If those who observe you conclude you have an elitist attitude, well, then you have an elitist attitude.
You say you are trying to drop whatever it is you say that causes this reaction.
Well, that brings to mind a funny moment on the old Mary Tyler Moore Show where Ted Baxter is all perplexed as to why people don't like him and what can he do to change that. Murray says to Ted, "You know how you act? Don't act that way anymore."
You say it'd help if you knew exactly what it was that caused this reaction.
And then you say don't give me examples from the last few days. That those are symptoms. No, Gar, they are examples.
Another one. Why is it I know you graduated at the top of your class of 9? Or that you were the smartest kid in school? Or that Ed thanks God every day that you moved to Wink? How many iterations of that info have been expressed over time?
Ask yourself, do you know where I stood in my HS school? Top, bottom or didn't graduate? No, you don't know, cuz it's nothing I would enter into the conversation stream.
Another example of projecting an elitist attitude? Well, let's use your Blog. Permit me to copy and paste....
"I've been addicted to computers since I was perhaps 11. I have some kind of innate ability to intuitively know how they will behave. I architect computer systems and design and write software for a living. I'm very good at it."
Do you see anything like the above on CT2's or my blog? I don't think so.
I'm not saying this is bad or even remotely suggesting you change a single word. I'm just saying that it is an example of an elitist attitude and a willingness to project that elitist attitude.
Now, I'm fine with that. It bothers me not in the least. But it is that type thing that could get you shoved down stairs when you make other kids feel inferior or that you are superior to them.
I've always found it amusing to get along with the dummies and my inferiors, with them never knowing I think they are my inferiors. I've even found it is fun to play dumb sometimes. You should give that a try.
Durango,
ReplyDeleteI'm only guessing and putting out there what I know to be true about myself. Maybe some of what I've learned about myself could provide Gar with some clarity, or maybe not.
I think your commentary was way better than mine and I very much liked it. And I surmise that you hit pay dirt. I do remember the very first time I read Gar's little paragraph about himself. My gut reaction was: Wow, what a braggart. And then I chuckled.
That reminds me, I was trying to think about what my innate ability is and I think I've figured it out...sticking my foot in my mouth. Tada!