Thursday, April 26, 2012

The Cool Doctor

Yes, you have read that correctly. Today, I had to go to the hip doctor. My brother said he must be a cool doctor.

I thought, a while back, that I had pulled my groin. After a few months, I decided it might be something more serious so I asked my primary doctor about it. She said I should take ibuprofen, go to physical therapy and if it still didn't get any better I should see a Cool Doctor.

Normally, my hip feels fine. I can't sit cross legged though. Any motion which twists my right leg to the outside can cause various amounts of discomfort; from a minor twinge to watery eyed pain.

The first thing the hip doctor did was take X-rays. He had his pretty, but pregnant, redheaded nurse perform the X-rays. Had I known then what I know now, I may have requested someone different. Let this be a warning to you. Pelvic X-rays leave nothing to the imagination.

The doctor came into my room to discuss with me what was wrong and sitting there, on his 17" Dell Laptop monitor, was a transparent black and white picture of my junk nestled politely between my two hips. It was alarming. I giggled heartily on the inside.

It was truly awesome. His cursor was a magnifying glass so when he moved the mouse around, everything under the cursor got enlarged for better viewing. I almost laughed out loud. He had to move from one hip to the other several times to explain what a healthy hip looked like (the left one) and a hip with calcification on the labrum looked like (the right one).

All the moving of the magnifying glass from one hip to the other was enough to make me squirm.

I wonder if that's what the body scanners at the airports look like. I can see why some people might get offended. I just thought it was cool. I'm thinking of applying for a job as a TSA scanner.

I can't find any appropriate pictures for this post. I kind of wish I could have worked up the courage to ask the doctor if he could send me a copy.


  1. Good gawd, I did not think X-rays showed soft tissue. I thought they only showed bone. What were you doing when the X-rays were being taken?

    Are you gonna need a hip replacement what with one of your hips being calcified?

    Methinks this will help you fit in much better on those cruises that you love so much.

    If I remember right, my grandma went on a cruise after she had her hips replaced.

  2. Well Durango, she was a sexy redhead.

    I have to go on Tuesday and have some special MRI done. Something about a shot of dye to make things show up better.

    Hopefully the radiologist will be homely.