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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Practice Makes Perfect

Blogging helps my communication skills. Since sometime last year, I quit blogging as much. I think I got burnt out after the crazy Presidential election or something. Today, I had an epiphany that this blogging stuff (even if no one reads it), helps with my writing skills and I am in dire need of help with my writing skills.

Mostly it helps because the Grammar Police Chief (Durango), is usually kind enough to point out all my mistakes. And, to be honest, Durango is a mighty fine writer. He writes more than I read every day.

In summary, I will use this blog space as writing practice. I'll pretend no one is reading it which is more than likely true anyway and spew forth all kinds of opinionated drivel coinciding with what I've done for the week or for the day.

At the end of each post I'll link you to my favorite current post by Durango so you can read something written by a professional writer and hopefully ease the pain. Don't skip to the end though. That wouldn't be fair.

My big event this week has been my trip to the doctor for my yearly exam. When I turned 40 I started getting prostate exams once a year. I didn't like that. When I turned 41 and a half someone decided that yearly prostate exams aren't necessary until you are 50. If I could find the person that made this decision I'd send him or her a thank you card.

My doctor told me to quit drinking (beer). I told her I drink to alleviate stress. She said, "Yeah, but drinking can make your blood sugar go out of whack." She may have used more educated verbiage. I said, "I guess I should quit eating too then." She didn't think it was funny and started blaming my second ex-wife for my drinking.

She asked if I was still single and I told her I'm getting married again in two weeks. She asked, "So, three strikes and you're out kind of thing?" I said, "No, third time's a charm kind of thing."

She said, "Why are you anxious?" On my little questionnaire I put down that I suffer from anxiety. I told her, "I've had anxiety problems all my life. It's another reason I drink." She said, "Well, you need to quit drinking, but I did notice you handled your second divorce better than your first divorce." I told her, "Practice makes perfect".

I think it was Durango who accused me of using too many cliche's. Instead of trying to fix the problem I just have accepted it and made it my own.

I think it was last week sometime, the bottom edge of the shower got in the way of my toe so I kicked the hell out of it. It made my left middle toe turn purple for a few days, but it's almost completely healed now. There is just a little discoloration under the nail. Anyway, she commented, "For someone who has had diabetes for 30+ years you have really good circulation." I said, "Thanks! It's because I drink beer."

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit! Here's Durango discussing the language of Southern Belles. The video is worth watching as well. I like the one who is demanding some sugar. She makes me happy.

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