Wednesday, February 11, 2009

A Personal Note with lots of Cool Opinions!

My blogger has been busted for about the last week. No, it's not a software problem. It's more of a personal thang. Durango has been harassing me about my grammar and spelling so I've decided to litter them throughout each post to give him a reason to read closely. You can play along too if you like. Actually, I'm not purposefully littering (not all the time). But, it'll be fun regardless.

There are certain people that come along in one's life at interesting points of time. It's like they appear out of the blue. You spend a weekend with them or maybe you spend a day here, a day there for a month or two and then they are gone. Not really gone as in dead, but they kind of fade from the front pages. You hear from then now and then, but it's never the same.

Nine years ago I was going through a divorce. After my separation and for some time after my divorce I was in the required rebound relationship. It wasn't really a healthy relationship, but at the same time, I think I needed it to prove to myself that there was someone (besides my ex-wife) who could tolerate my presence for any length of time. I'm a bit eccentric. I was married for 10 years before this event. I got married when I was 21 to a woman I'd been dating since I was 19. I had two kids and I thought the world, as I knew it, was over. Thus, the rebound.

Two people came along near the end of my rebound relationship. Well, one a couple months after. The first one was Durango. He, unwittingly, helped me end the rebound relationship. He also started trying to get me to get my haircut. I once had really long hair. We spent a lot of time out doing things I had never done before and we talked a lot.

Anyway, I attribute my haircut and my getting past my rebound to Durango (that's his stage name -- I can not give away his true identity on this blog). But, after my rebound and before I got my haircut I was doing the online dating thing. I believe and were the big ones at the time.

I put down on my profile that there was some people trying to get me to cut my hair. Of course, I put other stuff too as well as a picture. A girl (well woman -- she was older than me) sent me a message telling me that I looked good with long hair and I should basically do what makes me happy. If I want to keep my long hair the naysayers could just take a walk.

Can I go back to the woman/girl thing a bit? When I meet people they are either guys or men girls or women no matter how old they are. I hang out with guys that are 70 and men that are 27. It's a maturity thing. Some girls are 40, and some women are 22.

I met Lara when she was 33. She was born February 10, 1969 and I was born February 14, 1969. She was and still is very pretty. If it wasn't for her, I never would have met my wife. I had a bit of a self-esteem problem when I was 33. I had Durango telling me to cut my hair and I had women telling me to get lost. Lara helped me realize that there were eccentric beautiful women in the world who could put up and actually be attracted to my quirkiness. She was a confidence boost that I severely needed and she was really nice and insightful. She was going through some relationship woes at the time too. It was just one of those shared moments that had a lasting impact. I don't know how else to describe it.

So, these are two people I met by accident who made a profound impact in my life (Lara and Durango). I think Lara was actually Michelle or something when I first met her. It's part of the quirkiness that attracted me in the first place.

In 3 days, I'll turn 40. Since I turned 21, I've been wishing people would just forget about my birthday. I was born on Valentines Day and I've hated it for many years. So I don't know why I broadcast to the world when it is except maybe as a self-serving excuse as to why I posted this particular note.

On Saturday I'll turn 21 for the 19th time. And I wouldn't be married to my beautiful, angry, quirky, funny, German Frau if it wasn't for all the other quirky people I've met on the way here.

There's another guy who stuck around and didn't fade at all. If it wasn't for him I probably wouldn't have met Durango or Lara. He recently told me my 40's would be better than my 30's. I don't know if that's possible. We're going out on Friday. Maybe I'll see you around somewhere.


  1. I completely agree with you about people coming into your life for a season. I have recently reconnected with a really nice man that I dated back in college...over 20 years ago. It's as if we've never stopped talking. He's helped me over the past few months so much. I pretty much had given up on just about everything. I have just gone through a divorce from a 9 year marriage, it's my 3rd divorce. So, no matter what happens, i know i'll look back and always remember him fondly. :)

  2. Intersting post.
    I'm glad you met the Frau. Nice lady.

  3. Thanks Mr. Whited Sepu-something. I'm glad I met her too :). If any of you are lucky enough to stop here and read this, then you should go check out his blog. It's witty and it's political and it's insightful. Lots of good spirited, intelligent debate for everyone.

    Hey Anonymous, I think you might be my first Anonymous commenter. Congratulations. I can't help but wonder if everyone has these types of people and some just never notice. I'm glad things are looking up!

  4. I'm quite happy to oblige. I enjoyed reading your blog and found it geniunely sincere. Things are looking up...I'll be meeting my friend on the 10th of March. I'll let you know on the ides of march how that went. You keep blogging and i'll keep reading!

  5. This Durango character had a profound effect on you? I've heard that about him before. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I read somewhere that when your latest wife saw a photo of you with your sorely outdated mullet hair, she told you she would not have spoken to you if you still looked like that. Which likely would have put a big damper on that getting married thing. So, it would seem you owe your current wedded bliss to this Durango character. You should probably thank him profusely.

  6. The Durango character abandoned me because of "the vapors" or something. It could have also been his Dutch heritage was in contrast to my German spousal unit.
    Anyway, I've lost contact with him except through this strange blog he writes which seems to focus on Texas with occasional dark glimpses into personal trauma and nightmares of large women.