I do not hide the fact that I need therapy. Heck, I bet I could keep an expert psychologist entertained for years.
Last night, for example, I had the most fantastic dream…
I hired a divorce attorney and when I went to the office, the attorney was a very good looking late 30’s woman. She was tall, slender and powerful, yet funny and nice. She laughed at all my silly jokes and even had some of her own. She was smart and easy to talk to. A perfect picture in a suit and heels.
Then, I woke up and tried to go back to sleep, but it wasn’t happening. Next time I’ll double my dose of Benadryl. Have you ever looked at the active ingredients of Benadryl and the nighttime Sleep Aids? Benadryl costs half as much, but the active ingredients are identical. Go figure.
I decided to represent myself because “nobody loves me like I love myself”. I don’t know why the video is on its side. Maybe it’s just my browser. If I play all my cards right, I should be legally single in about 70 days.
So...does this mean you're illegally single now?
ReplyDeleteDepends on which words you want to flip flop, but I like the phrase illegally single. It sets me up for the many joys of living in sin.
ReplyDeleteHa ha...Oh, believe me...it's pure joy ;-)
ReplyDeleteWhen I was getting divorced many years ago, one of the the attorneys that I interviewed was just like the attorney in your dream.
ReplyDeleteShe was so distracting that I couldn't hire her.
I remember I also dreamed a very weird dream when I broke up with my ex boyfriend. Mine was that I couldn’t move properly to react to him, which was horrible in the dream and though I was woken up in the middle of the night, I didn’t want to go back to sleep again. Now I reckon, even though I had always thought I loved him so much but at the same time, like in the dream, there was something about him that made me emotionally immobile.
ReplyDeletep.s. if I want to dream like yours, should I get some Benadrly..?? :)
PS - You're a wiser man than me. I'd hired her on the spot.
ReplyDeleteJen, I don't know if Benadryl helps with the dreams or just the sleep. More experimentation is the order of the day. If you get some Benadryl, please let me know your results :).